To Lift or Not To Lift...!

My arms a burnin'...... Almost a ya' sammity Sam moment lol

Today I woke up and I felt as though my switch has finally clicked. It's my choices, my choices define me and they will help me achieve my small goals.

Anyway lol today is a great day.... I got up, downed my shakeology shake and got into my warrior gear - my uniform if you will! and the hubby put me through my weights workout.

Sadly I hurt my lower spine on the lower set of declining bench presses ; as I went to get up I jarred my lower back and so modified with the picture you see below, with my legs raised on a step.

Aaron agrees that we can incorporate more moves in the future for my triceps and delts :) yay lol

I don't want create a stale workout programme and not enjoy the journey - I can understand that some MUST follow a strick routine in order to appear in a body competition but at the moment I am just trying to increase my threshold BUT I am open to advice and tweaks if necessary.

I feel fantastic and I wanted to share that with you. Now it is time for a lovely quick stir fry and ALOT of water, this is a difficult for me as I can be quite absent minded with my water but I will be trying ;)

Much love
Em x

Workout is - as workout does!

Why yes she did get off her arse and get a workout done :)

Not much but it's done. Had a few snaffoo's whilst trying to get it done though, whilst sorting myself out I managed to cut my thumb tip open with my index finger nail! My hand slipped and it caught it - me not realising then made matters worse by getting blood on the sofa. When all sorted I thought 'screw this' and decided that the workout WILL continue only to find halfway through that I would in fact roll my dodgy ankle......the ankle I mention in my 'about'. Utter panic ensued, I heard it click - is it broken again??? It 'seems' ok so far so I will keep an eye on it today and as I must head off to my family's home soon I will test it with a walk.

Needless to say the workout got finished - all 45 minutes of it and now I must shower or that's just not fair on the hubby lol :)

It felt good to sweat and I had that wonderful happy feeling after that I knew I had made the right decision to workout and stop being a pity party!

Although it seems that the universe is against me with all my hic-ups it still got done ;)

That's 485 calories gone bye bye and I will enjoy the rest of my day off.
My poor hubby is sadly injured at the moment which is what brought a quick holt to our running schedule .... He bent down after running and the back of his knee popped!!! Doctors appointment ASAP I hope as he can't run and he wants to.

On the whole there are not enough words in my vocab to say how thankful I am for all your kind words these past few days - it has literally blown me away and gave me such motivation to continue - and for that I thank you all

Em x

Time to reboot...!!!

Sometimes as a person we make mistakes, and sometimes that mistake is falling back into old habits!!!

Often you find yourself in a situation you have been in the past and without a second thought you are shoving your hand into a giant bag of pretzels, or 2 bagels, junk, junk and more junk!

I have been feeling so ill the last few days......just bloated, nauseous, uncomfortable and down right awful :-(

I will be honest I have tried to reach out to some friends that I hoped I could confide in but sadly I was unable to reach anyone and so here I am being accountable.

Due to the original reasons for my weight gains and yo-yo's it has become a reality that I will always need to have a grip on my health and the realisation that I am worth the bloody effort!

The idea that I will always battle my weight is terrifying to me. The idea that I could really f*$k up and gain it all back and more has me stopping as I type. Yes I realise that this was/is me hitting the proverbial wall and yes it sounds 'woe is me' but sometimes you need to focus on yourself - especially when you feel isolated and alone. By this I mean being able to identify to anyone or a situation similar to my own.

I am however my own person, my own story and I now realise my own inspiration. It is going through these moments, days, weeks and food f*$k up's that will make me ultimately stronger and able to rely upon my judgement.

I am no advocate to 'perfection', hell i don't think that even exists, and I do sometimes f*$k up BUT I am learning as I go. Nutrition is and always be my Achilles heel!

I have been soul searching, if that is indeed possible, for a while and I have found that I don't crave an ideal body, or perfect abs or delts... WHAT I WANT IS CONFIDENCE! The ability to stand in front of or walk past a mirror and not grimace!

The final point is; what am I willing to do to achieve inner confidence???

Well honestly I want to smile when I see my reflection or put on a dress. I have NEVER been one to do the whole 'I'll start on Monday' thing but as my husband pointed out tonight, the week starts over on a Monday - why not refocus!

And so I am - my focus is me, as selfish as it may appear. I am the only one who can better my health - my choices and behaviour define me (that is my belief) and I am choosing to continue with my journey.

I am making a dedication - hell even a promise - to myself, my husband and to all of you in the Internet void that I WILL SUCEED and tomorrow is just a good a day as any.

I hope you will all join me in this journey and PLEASE understand that I am only human and I make mistakes.

I am going to go to bed and 'reboot' my drive, mojo and motivation. I will awake in the morning with a feeling of self-worth and accomplishment.

I hope you are all ready to see posts from me everyday :-) you are not rid of me yet lol

Sending love and most of all a smile :-D

Em x

Once Upon a Pumpkin Soup!!!

Well it is official I am all better now :-)

Worst cold/man flu/bird flu/what ever it was!!! I am happy it has left my system.

So I am back to preparing meals in advance and today was an autumn pumpkin soup but as you can see from the picture it had so much more than pumpkin lol

All diced and chucked into a HUGE saucepan with 1 litre of boiling water in it and then I added cumin, chilli flakes, parsley, basil, turmeric and 2 vegetable stock cubes and a broth cube!

I boiled it before I left for work - after 35 mins I turned off the heat and left the lid on. When I came back on my break I blended it and portioned it up! And all done..... I did have a rather special moment though lol (when don't I lol)

After portioning I decided to lick the spoon.... Now is a good time for me to mention that I can't handle hot food!!! A polo mint is often too much for me.... That's right you guessed it, I was coughing and wheezing and my eyes were pouring! Stupid ginger moments of mine lol

If my hubby had been home he would have been laughing his head off! I wasn't silly enough to rub my eye or anything..... Think I will save that for next time lol

I am not sleeping very well at the moment so I have some Horlicks 'light' at the ready for tonight and I WILL sleep....I hope lol

Em x